OKAY SO ALMOST 2 MONTHS AGO OUR ENGLISH TEACHER FORCED US TO ENTER A POETRY CONTEST AND I WAS ABOUT TO ENTER A POEM WHEN IT TRIED TO FORCE ME TO GIVE IT A TITLE SO IN A FIT OF RAGE I WROTE A NEW POEM COMPLAINING ABOUT THE TITLE REQUIREMENT
AND TODAY I WENT TO CHECK MY EMAIL AND I??????
YOU ARE LITERALLY PUBLISHING AN INSULT TO YOUR OWN RULES BUT OKAY I GUESS IF GETTING TALKED DOWN TO TURNS YOU ON SOMEHOW AND I GET PUBLISHED I’VE GOT NO COMPLAINTS HERE?
IM LITERALLY ABOUT TO SCREAM I WATCHED SUPERNATURAL FOR THE FIRST TIME AND DEANS VOICE DOES NOT MATCH UP WITH HIS BODY I SWEAR HIS VOICE IS SO DEEP OHMYGO D
DID YOU WATCH THE LAST EPISODE OR ?? BECAUSE HIS VOICE IS PRETTY HIGH IN S1
IT DROPS PROPORTIONALLY ALONG WITH HIS HAPPINESS
WHICH HAPPENS TO RUN PERPENDICULAR TO HIS HETEROSEXUALITY
reasons to let me cuddle you:
- I will stick my cold hands all over your body
- I’ll probably fall asleep on you and make cute sleep noises
- I can lay there long enough for the second coming of christ
- I will be smiling the whole time
- you’re warm and I’m not
- let me leech your heat
A bus driver who tried to rape a passenger at knifepoint chose the wrong victim, a court heard yesterday.
The woman, an off-duty US navy sailor, knocked the knife from his grasp, broke it in two, bit his hand, wrestled him to the ground and put him in a stranglehold between her thighs.
Having beaten him into submission, she left the bus and reported the incident to her commander.
she broke a knife in half
happy birthday. we couldn’t afford to put a stripper in your cake like you wanted so instead we just put your cake in a stripper. she ate the whole thing in like 2 minutes. you should have been there. it was amazing.
FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT you are allowed to feel proud of yourself for things that might seem silly to other people, like getting better at a video game or putting together a nice outfit for the next morning or finishing a book. You deserve to feel proud for your accomplishment.
*does the anime character with glasses thing*
Felix has picked up some choice language from his wife, but on the rare occasion when he lets it slip out it’s in Q*Bertese… because Vanellope can’t pronounce it and therefore can’t repeat it.
If you flirt with me you’re not allowed to flirt with anyone else sorry I don’t make the rules
if i had the power to control time i would probably just use it to sleep more
if you stopped it in a test
at the last minute
just wandered off, brought your notes in, finished it correctly and put them back
that would be a good idea too
If you could stop time you wouldn’t do tests you could just take stuff from shops and live off that
no thats illegal